I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Candid Conversation.

The Austrian Oak is rightfully celebrated as an Hollywood heavyweight. But, in the midst of his cinematic dominance in the 1980s and 1990s, he also headlined several critically acclaimed comedies. A prime example is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35-year mark this December.

The Role and An Iconic Moment

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger embodies a hardened detective who poses as a schoolteacher to locate a fugitive. For much of the film's runtime, the investigation plot acts as a basic structure for Schwarzenegger to share adorable interactions with kids. Without a doubt the standout features a child named Joseph, who spontaneously stands up and informs the actor, “It's boys who have a penis, females have a vagina.” The Terminator replies icily, “Thank you for that information.”

The boy behind the line was brought to life by child star Miko Hughes. Beyond this role encompassed a character arc on Full House as the schoolyard menace to the child stars and the pivotal role of the child who returns in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with a slate of movies on the horizon. He also engages with fans at fan conventions. Not long ago recalled his recollections from the filming of the classic 35 years later.

Memories from the Set

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I don't recall being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're snapshots. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would accompany me to auditions. Sometimes it was a mass tryout. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all just have to wait, be seen, be in there less than five minutes, read a small part they wanted and that's all. My parents would help me learn the words and then, as soon as I could read, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was very kind. He was playful. He was good-natured, which arguably stands to reason. It'd be weird if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a good work environment. He was great to work with.

“It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a big action star because I was told, but I had barely seen his movies. I knew the air around him — it was exciting — but he wasn't scary to me. He was just fun and I only wanted to hang out with him when he had time. He was occupied, of course, but he'd kind of play with us here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd show his strength and we'd be holding on. He was incredibly giving. He purchased for each child in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was like an iPhone. This was the must-have gadget, that funky old yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It finally gave out. I also have a authentic coach's whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being positive?

You know, it's funny, that movie is such a landmark. It was a major production, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, traveling to Oregon, the production design, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I wasn't a pizza fan. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the original Game Boy was brand new. That was the hot thing, and I was quite skilled. I was the youngest and some of the bigger kids would hand me their devices to beat difficult stages on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all childhood recollections.

The Infamous Moment

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember how it happened? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word provocative meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it made adults laugh. I knew it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given special permission in this case because it was funny.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it came about, from what I understand, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. A few scenes were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the kids together, it wasn't pure improvisation, but they worked on it while filming and, I suppose it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "I need to consider this, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she was hesitant, but she thought it could end up as one of the iconic quotes from the movie and history proved her correct.